Tips on Parenting

There was a time not too many years ago when baby strollers were much like the Model-T Ford. You could have any style you wanted, so far as it was just the single type offered. With flaky rubber tires on rickety tin wheels and covered with cheap plastic, it was a thing to behold. Today, the ancestors of those old strollers are a technological wonder.

The frames themselves are now virtually indestructible. One might not survive being run over by the car, but anything else hardly fazes them. The alloys and manufacturing process used have made them the safest form of transport around. Integrated harnesses are practically unbreakable today.

They’re also incredibly convenient. They are commonly outfitted with telescoping handles that make it a literal snap to adjust to fit a person of any height. That means if Mom uses it one day and Dad the next, followed by the babysitter the following day, no one has to get a backache leaning down to push.

They have a dozen other features that are a combination of safety and convenience.

Wheels have simple to activate locking mechanisms to prevent rollaway when you pause on a grade. No more worrying about your hands slipping or getting distracted if you stop to have a chat. It’s also almost impossible to get your clothing snagged on any part. With rounded corners, smooth high-density plastic and fabric padding in all the right places, contemporary strollers are a joy to use.

Even traditional designs often featured a canopy to keep the sun off of the baby’s head. But that feature has been enhanced beyond the recognition of older nannies. Detachable, collapsible, fitted with heavy shade or thin mesh to just block UV…these are only three of a dozen innovations employed in just this one area.

You can easily fold up the canopy and tuck it away with no problem. Or, flip it out in an instant and never worry about it tearing. Many models go by the name ‘umbrella stroller’, which tells you all you need to know about this variation on a theme.

Many designs today are modular. That means, among other things, that the bed or seat portion can be detached and used as a hard shell carrier, car seat or bassinet. Then it locks right back into place, easily and securely.

Attachments abound. Diaper bags fit on with snaps, straps or in an integrated pocket. A foldable changing table can slide into the base, under the bed or seat section. Store your purse or camera securely in one of a dozen sturdy fabric pockets.

Traditional four-wheel, rectangular shapes are no longer the only option, either. For joggers, a three-wheeled triangular stroller makes for a little easier journey. Easily push the baby along with you while you maintain your exercise routine.

Need to stroll with twins? A double or twin stroller is just the thing. Babies sit side by side and enjoy the ride. Prefer a tandem arrangement with one in front, the other in back? These are also available.

Now the only problem you’ll have with chosing a stroller is resisting the urge to buy several models.

Sometimes a child labeled ‘difficult’ is just expressing a healthy need for independence. But in other cases, the label is actually too mild. Adults can be violent, irresponsible, indifferent to the harm they do others and typically that behavior begins in childhood.

Not all such children are potential criminals, but they share some of the characteristics – refusal to fully accept reality, poor impulse control, lack of empathy, disrespect for the rights of others and a range of destructive behavior against people, animals and property.

Usually the signs are all too clear to parents – refusal to accept limits or take instruction, shouting, temper tantrums and sometimes hitting siblings or even parents. Sometimes the condition is influenced by genetic and hormonal factors – as in Asperger’s Syndrome, ADHD or even autism. It can be magnified by stressful factors in the environment.

Some temperaments are natural, such as extreme sensitivity to stimuli, some moods can be brought on by new elements such as a new child in the home. Sometimes, as with adults, it’s simply a choice to misbehave.

Sorting out all these complex factors is one of the parent’s toughest jobs. Testing may help. It can be useful to get a good diagnosis, but take what you hear with a grain of salt. Consult more than one specialist when possible. There is a lot of junk science in child development.

But whatever the causes, the parent will need to exercise even more than normal patience to deal with the child’s behavior. Frustration and anger are normal, but only add to an already difficult situation.

Dealing with the child and its behavior can range from simple time outs to distraction to some drug therapy (in extreme cases). When a child misbehaves and refuses to listen, removing a wanted toy or restraining a desired activity can be helpful. It should be accompanied by clear and firm expressions of the reasons for the actions. That helps the child associate its unwanted behavior with the consequences.

Physical punishment rarely helps, but a tap on the hand is hardly abuse. Parents should avoid feeling guilty, as if they caused the behavior. There are abusive parents, but these are not the ones who are seeking to understand and mold their child’s actions toward more healthy expressions.

Be prepared to alter the environment. It may be necessary in some cases to not have pets in the house and siblings should be protected from any bad behavior. Often, with patience and the employment of standard techniques, the child’s behavior can be altered, sometimes dramatically.

Dealing with difficult children is, by definition, difficult. But with patience and training both parents and children can achieve satisfying results.

You want a playmat for your baby that is safe, fun, decorative, comfortable, and… did we mention safe? Lucky you. It’s easy to get all that and more.

The Chicco Jungle Activity Playmat is made of soft and durable material. No need to worry about torn off bits getting swallowed. But talk about fun! Colorful and covered with a giraffe, zebra, elephant and monkey, it’s a zoo at home. In one corner the mirror will fascinate. In the other, your baby will have a great time tugging on the giraffe’s legs. In another, she can squeeze the monkey’s banana and make delightful sounds. She’ll crinkle the elephant then chew on his teething ring.

How about the K’s Kids Fold N Go Deluxe Playmat? With more colors than the rainbow, the sewn-in yellow bear is dazzled. Your baby will be too when he snuggles up in the cushy arms and leans his head on the bear’s soft shoulder. The bear’s head will look out over everything and make sure everyone is safe during the nap. When baby wakes up he’ll be looking into the ladybird mirror, playing with the squeezable frog squeakers and the detachable frog pond.

Head to the beach without leaving the living room with a Infantino Surfboard Tummy Time Mat. With a prop-up pillow she can keep her head above the ‘waves’. On each side there are attached rings and things to keep the little one entertained. ‘Squeak!’ goes the little fish. Fill the removable pouch with water and give your baby her own miniature aquarium. Moms will appreciate the accompanying growth chart as they watch their little one grow.

Whoever said a playmat has to be flat, though? Check out the Peek ‘N Play Discovery Dome. Your baby will! Highly colorful, ultra-sturdy and safe, safe, safe. Strong fabric covers soft but firm supports to make a little tent that the baby will enjoy hiding in. Open at both ends with light mesh, you can still keep an eye on him as he tackles the monkey. He’ll be kicking the hanging toys and dropping balls down the chute before you know it.

Ribbon hair on the monkey is just one of the many touchables on this first-rate playmat. Short, soft-plastic fences sport images and toys that will amuse as they educate. The baby can rattle the fish rattle or enjoy the spider teething ring. He’ll pick up the monkey rattle and give it a shake while answering the pretend squeaker phone. Oops! Someone just rang the doorbell on the front. Better open the curtain and find out who’s there.

Check out all the playmats and you might soon find you wouldn’t mind having one of these to play with yourself!

It’s common knowledge that human pregnancy lasts nine months. But that figure is really just an average. While the official figure is pegged at 266 days, it’s still widely recognized that a normal gestation may be anywhere from 1-2 weeks less or more than that.

One of the reasons is that it’s difficult in most cases to know the exact day on which conception occurred. So, the number of days until birth is usually calculated using the last menstrual period. An equally important reason is simply the fact of individual variation. It’s perfectly normal and healthy for a gestation to last 260 days or 270.

But as that distance from the average grows greater, the potential for certain problems increases. In particular, a birth that takes place three weeks or more prior to the full gestation period represents increasing risk of developmental problems for the newborn.

The earliest survival from premature birth on record is roughly 21 weeks. But even 24-26 weeks carries with it substantial likelihood of problems. These cover an underdeveloped brain and nervous system, inadequate lung development and others. These all may result in difficulties immediately after birth and later in life.

Some consequences may be as serious as mental retardation. Others are much more manageable, such as lower surfactant in the lung tissue, which can lead to Respiratory Distress Syndrome. The former requires lifelong care for the child. The latter, thanks to modern medicine, can often be compensated for by a simple treatment.

Any of these (and many other) issues are, of course, heavily dependent on just how premature the newborn is. There are individual factors as well. Some babies who are 3-4 weeks early may do just fine with normal neonatal care. Others will require more extensive assistance and longer term professional treatment.

But, there are many things that parents can do to help their newborn during those early, sometimes trying weeks and months.

Prevention is the first line of defense. To whatever degree possible, and consistent with the health of mother and child, premature birth can be delayed. ‘Whatever possible’ is getting better and better as medical practice improves. Everything from a better diet to lowered stress and full bed rest to courses of glucocorticoids to stimulate development of the fetus are possible.

Early treatment in the hospital is frequently very high caliber. Premature babies may have a breathing tube, heart and blood pressure monitors, careful temperature control, frequent in-person visits from nurses and other care to ensure their well-being. Once babies can breath normally on their own, regulate and maintain a stable body temperature, breastfeed or bottle feed normally, and gain weight steadily they’ll be ready to go home.

Managing certain neurologic disorders such as Retinopathy of Prematurity (ROP) and Hypoxic-Ischemic Encephalopathy (HIE) that may result from premature birth are outside the scope of this article. Seek professional advice. But there are less serious conditions that can be dealt with by parents, with advice from the obstetrician.

Infections are more common in ‘preemies’, owing in part to their even more immature immune system than that of the usual newborn. But extra care to avoid disease causing organisms takes only vigilance. Dietary supplements that help boost the immune system can be safe and effective, if provided under professional care. Too many are just placebos and some are potentially harmful. The literature is vast and regrettably there are unfounded claims made sometimes.

Apnea – episodes of stopped breathing, especially during sleep – can occur. Extra vigilance can be provided for by a baby sound-and-video monitoring system. Jaundice, a yellowing of the skin or whites of the eyes due to improper liver function or bile duct blockage, is easy to spot. It results from a buildup of bilirubin in the bloodstream. Usually it’s harmless. Special lights are available to help treat the condition. Exposure to sunlight can help, but it carries risks. Again, when in doubt, call your doctor.

Parents can help themselves and their child by getting rest and getting educated. Establish a milk supply. Get assistance from friends and family members for those first critical weeks or months. Keep careful records of the baby’s progress. Try to keep the stress level down as much as possible.

Today, except in the most extreme cases, premature birth is much less a problem than in generations past. Many highly accomplished individuals (such as Charles Darwin and Albert Einstein) were born prematurely. Some say they never stop overcompensating!

When you’re out in public and need a place to change the baby’s diaper, you take what you can get, unless you happen to carry a portable changing table. But at home it’s possible to get a changing table that is fully functional, ultra-safe and even supremely stylish.

The classic changing table is a three-level affair made of hardwood supported by brackets. Because it is a classic it still performs excellent service. But contemporary designs have added extra function and style.

A modern classic changing table will have integrated bracing. They may be in the slats or underneath. That substantially increases the sturdiness over models of the past. Hardwoods today are pressure treated and coated with durable finishes to provide a changing table that stands up to long use while remaining beautiful for decades.

The latest designs offer changing tables with the classic three levels – for changing, for storing skin supplies and for diapers and other needed items – while expanding the range of choices. Cherry, oak and other hardwoods make for a fashion statement that would make the living room envy the nursery.

Some design variations provide drawers in place of shelves. That turns the changing table into a combination nursery station and dresser. That’s very handy for storing those larger items you want out of sight and providing a lovely addition to the baby’s room. All finishes are carefully formulated to be non-toxic to parent and child.

Sometimes that rectangular shape just doesn’t fit in with your preferred layout, though. Not to worry; changing tables are available in corner-style options that fit right in. They still provide a large surface area, giving plenty of room to maneuver. They come with a changing pad specifically designed for this alternative shape, or you can use a section of one that might be used on a standard rectangle.

Changing pads themselves have undergone an evolution over the years.

Once made of cheap foam rubber or simple fabric covering a mundane stuffing, they now sport the latest technology. Some are made of memory foam that provides a body-forming cushion that is the ultimate in comfort. Others are goose down like the most luxurious pillows. Still others may be a modern blend of materials that combines great moisture wicking properties with supreme softness.

All are designed with the baby’s health and safety uppermost in mind.

Fabrics are made of mildew-resistant, hypo-allergenic material. Stuffing is manufactured to the highest standards of durability and are completely sterile. The shapes are carefully formed to minimize the odds of a fidgety baby sliding while they give the changer maximum function. Also available in a range of colors and designs, they add stellar style to their function.

Development milestones begin even before birth. They’re often easy to see using ultrasound and other techniques. But after birth, some may be harder to spot. They’re just as important, though, since they mark the first year of your baby’s rapid growth during this important period. These encompass a whole range of changes involving motor skills, the visual system and cognitive development.

The First Month

During the first month a baby that is developing well can be expected to exhibit strong reflex movements. They’ll often bring the hands to the mouth, exploring all manner of tactile sensations. They’ll frequently exercise the head from side to side, displaying the beginnings of mastery of muscle control and visual acuity.

At this stage, they can focus about 8-12 inches away, roughly the distance from mother’s nipple to her nose. The eyes will wander, but they’re not random. They’re taking in the scene. The baby should blink at the sight of a bright light. High contrast patterns are attractive, but none more than that of the human face.

They can turn the head, reacting with attention to sounds (especially loud ones) and even familiar voices.

The First Trimester

Pregnancy has a first trimester, but so does the period after birth. During these three months the newborn is growing and developing profoundly. Changes seem to come almost daily.

Motor skills are sharpening and strengthening now. The baby can raise his or her head and even the chest slightly when lying on the stomach. Opening and closing the fists is common as they gain control over finger and arm muscles. The first signs of pushing down with the feet to support the legs can be seen.

At this time of life the visual system is sharpening considerably. By the end of three months they can watch a face with concentration and follow moving objects deliberately. The beginnings of recognizing people and objects become clarified. Hand-eye coordination is evident.

Social skills start about now. Smiling, enjoyment in the company of others and similar behaviors begin. Imitation of the behavior of others shows its first stirrings.

Through the Second Trimester

By the end of 6-7 months, those early gropings are ramping up. The baby can sit without support of their hands. He or she may be able to support her entire weight on the legs, perhaps with a little help from a nearby table or chair. During this period they have achieved enough muscle control to reach for and grasp small objects.

Full color vision is now possible. Being able to make out objects at a distance matures to the point of recognizing people and things across the room. He or she can track them as they move.

Cognitive skills start emerging clearly now. He or she may unmistakably respond to a personal name. Imitation turns to response as he or she repeats back sounds that will later become words. Those sounds start to get strung together into what will, before you know it, be short sentences.

The First Year

By the end of the first year those stumbles and babbles have become walking and talking. The baby can now make short trips across the room, from chair to table. He or she can say a few simple words, including that all important ‘Momma’ and ‘Dada’.

Cognitive skills start to mature into value selection as the child displays a preference for certain people and/or toys, excluding others not desired. The first challenges to parental choice start to emerge. The baby learns the word ‘no’ and may use it at times you’d prefer otherwise.

Each child is an individual. While he or she shares many similarities with babies of the same age, each one develops at a unique rate and in an individual way. Milestones are rough guidelines. Einstein spoke late. Beware of assumptions about what is ‘normal’.